The Pumpkins Start Here

I’ve got the viney plants started on the window sill. These are the watermelon. See anything? Neither do I. I don’t have high hopes for the watermelon but I’m going to try again.

Also, I downloaded an app that’s supposed to make my photos prettier. What do you think?

Yeah, this one is definitely blurry, but I only took one because I am in a hurry. Things have kicked back up into insanely busy while simultaneously throwing new and surprising problems my way.

These are the Cinderella pumpkins. They look pretty good.

I had a low tire so I swung by Les Schwab on my way home from work. How long has it been since I sung the praises of Les Schwab? It was 30 minutes before closing. They were fairly busy and the phone ringing. Unfailingly polite – like they it was the highlight of their day looking at my tire. I love that place.

I had a screw in my tire and it’s fixed and I was on my way by 6pm. And one problem, easily solved.

The little tiny sprouts are basil. They get to stay inside. The next one is the single cantaloupe sprout and then more pumpkins.

I still don’t have a shower door. Boo! I haven’t had a decent shower in over a month. I remember writing about the front door knob but can’t find the post. Whatever I did to fix it was only temporary so we need to deal with that. I still don’t have any tomatoes. It goes on and on. I always feel like I’m one day off from getting caught up.

I’m taking off for the weekend. Hopefully it will be blissful sitting around. Also a hotel shower. Yay.

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By Any Other Name

Did I mention we have a lady team?

I’m not completely sold on this iPhone camera yet. But since I am learning to use the phone on the 5 minutes a week schedule, I’m hoping there are some tricks that I haven’t figured out yet.

And sadly, as it turns out, this additional set of home games is the straw that is breaking the camel’s back.

If I had no interest in writing, or my butt size, or how clean my house is, or how weedy my yard is, or how much sleep I get, I could do all this.

Or if I was independently wealthy and didn’t want to work.

But as it turn out, I am having a tough time managing all these games along with all the other things that I would like to accomplish in my life.

I love the team. The goalie is my new girl crush. But I am learning that sometimes it’s okay to skip a game. This includes the U-23 games and at least one exhibition game. Next year when it’s World Cup, it’s going to be crazy.

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Garden Update

We had decent weather in the middle of last month. Bob was kind enough to help me and we were human rototillers, spread a bunch of manure, raked up the soil and were ready for planting.

I went crazy in the seed section and in a burst of enthusiasm, bought a bunch of seed packets. When I got home I found I still had tons of seeds from previous years.

One seed packet has too many seeds for the casual home farmer. I put all the expired seeds into a cup, mixed in a little dirt and then flung over our freshly prepared soil. Then I raked.

What you see here is the results although most of the sprouts are hidden in the shade. I think I have lots of beets and greens. Also, volunteer sunflowers. I’m going to be meaner to the sunflowers this year. Last year I let them have their way and they over-crowded everything else.

That part in the front where the cages are, those are peas. I planted every seed I could find.

I still haven’t put tomatoes in and I have got to get a rosemary bush going. Mine died a couple of years ago and then the replacement died and that is an herb that I actually use on a regular basis. I started the pumpkins inside on the windowsill and I’m trying some melons this year. I don’t think it’s warm enough but it’s fun to try.

For years we had an apple tree pruner. A couple of years ago he had a hip replacement and had to prune late. I wondered it if was a bad idea to let an elder with a recently replaced hip stand on a ladder and prune a tree in my yard.

But he was up for it and it went just fine. Last year he retired and we went prune-less.

We found someone new this year who did a terrific job. We will not have the apple-mageddon that we had last year.

Every once in awhile I get suckered into these variety flower seed packages. The result is either nothing or one single flower that ends up reseeding itself in every nook and cranny for miles. It looks like I finally eradicated the chamomile, which is a shame because I liked that plant. Now I have these orange flowers.

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Green Machine

Today the Portland Timbers did a Make-A-Wish event where they played a game against the Green Machine, a team of 8 year olds. The event was in honor of Atticus who found out he had cancer when he had pain while playing with his team last year. He missed their final match because of his treatments.

He wanted his wish to include his teammates.

3000 fans attended the match which was during lunch hour. The supporters group made special banners and signs and revised the chants in favor of the Green Machine. There is no way to convey how amazing it was to be a part of this event.

There’s a great video recap here.

The Oregonian has a terrific photo essay here. There’s also a Facebook photostream here.

Even Deadspin couldn’t come up with anything bad to say about it.

A few highlights:

The Green Machine won 10-9 with Atticus scoring 4 goals including the game winner.

The post game remarks note: “It was the first loss for the Timbers since March 9.”

When the Timbers came onto the field they were booed and serenaded with around of “Go home you bums.” They also got booed every time they scored. The Timbers team captain Will Johnson was busted with a couple of fouls and was booted out of the game with a red card while his teammates protested.

In the first half the Timbers fielded 4 players and I don’t remember how many the Green Machine had, maybe 8. In the second half the Green Machine’s entire bench was on the field and it was hilarious watching the Timbers try to do anything when surrounded by Green Machine players.

At the end of the match, the team captain traded jerseys with Atticus and then put the tiny jersey on.

Updated to add: Here’s a better video clip. The whole thing is great but the bit when the Green Machine see their locker room is priceless.

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Cold Call

I usually avoid writing too much about work but this isn’t about my employer so I think it will be okay.

Not long ago a copier salesguy came by the office to tell us about his company. In my career I have told approximately 20,000 of these guys to take a hike but on this day, I was interested.

I welcomed him in, told him we would be looking at copiers soon. I showed him the copier we had and what the terms were and explained what we were looking for.

Him: Can you give me a copy of your copier lease?

No, I said.

He returned another day with his manager and they continued their spiel and brought some pictures of copiers and told us about some other services that we’d expressed an interest in.

Them: Can we get a copy of your copier lease?

No, we said.

Later I asked for a good faith estimate that we could use for our budget to take to our boss. I gave him at least 3 weeks. Two days before the I needed the numbers I followed up and asked if he could get me an estimate. Didn’t hear from him.

Over a week later I got an email.

Him: Can I get a copy of your copier lease so I can get you that estimate?

No, I said, and it’s too late anyway.

Later I told him we were seeking proposals and I sent him a sheet explaining what we were looking for and reminded him what we already had and what we were paying.

He sent me back an email that said what we were looking for didn’t need a proposal and they would lease us a machine and charge us based on what we used.

For reasons not related to this story, we’ve had to delay getting the new copier.

I just about dropped my teeth when a few weeks ago a different salesguy from the same company came in here to ask me if I was interested in talking about copiers.

I told him the entire backstory and he made an appointment to bring his manager in.

I had to cancel it because we had something going on here and when I called he informed me that *he* had to cancel and was intending to tell me this, “soon.” He would call back to reschedule.

And I’ve never heard from him.

Clearly, we decided not to do business with these people a long time ago. Colleague has asked me to stop talking to them.

But I’m dying to see how far this thing will go. How many times we can ask and still not have one useful piece of data about what their company can do for us?

[Note: I updated the post to clarify that they wanted to see our copier lease.]

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In Reference To The Stoves Required At This Post

I don’t like to wear sunglasses. I feel like I can’t see when I have them on. I have an sunglasses holder in my car and every once in awhile it will be super bright out (only about 3 days a year in this neck of the woods) and I’ll reach into the holder for sunglasses. Only there are never any glasses in there because I don’t wear sunglasses.

A few weeks ago it was really bright out and I reached into the sunglass holder and found these. We got them as a promo at a game last year but I don’t remember putting them in the car. They don’t really help with the whole, “I feel like I can’t see when I have them on” thing.

This morning I finished George Saunders. Then I picked up my Siskiyou County Historical Society publication.

With very little editing, the “Selected Entries from Military Notes from Fort Jones, 1852-1858″ could pass for a George Saunders story. It’s hard to find even a brief quote that conveys the dark hilarity of these letters. The gist of this particular exchange is that Fort Jones needs some cookstoves because they either have to cook outside or with some sort of stove that has chimneys made of mud and don’t draw well and all the food is sooty.

Here’s a tidbit from a letter from D.A. Rupell dated January 4th, 1855:

The condition of the chimneys, and the means now used for cooking, are a most serious annoyances to the officers, and a source of very great dissatisfaction among the men — and as the cost of material at this place with which to build proper chimneys would be very great, the length of time which must elapse before they could be completed, and the entire uncertainty of their being fit for use after they are completed, I think it would be a matter of economy, as well as justice for the A.A.Q.M. to purchase two cooking stoves for the above purposes if such purchase would be allowed by the Department.

Naturally, I have no sympathy since the letters also discuss one of the troops’ main purposes for being there: operations against the Indians. The book is called the Siskiyou Pioneer and Yearbook, 2012 and if you want to get your hands on a copy, try the gift shop.

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The Shower Door Disaster of 2013

Two weeks ago I was wiping down the shower doors and they got gummed up so they wouldn’t slide on the track. In the process of trying to fix this, I knocked one of the doors completely off the track.

I very quickly learned that these shower doors are made of actual glass and weigh a million pounds. There was a split second where I was certain I would win a Darwin Award for bleeding to death in my own bathtub after cutting off my foot with a shower door — all because of cleaning.

I was able to control it enough to not hurt myself and screamed my head off and my husband ran in and lifted the thing off me. There was a handful of glass shards in the bottom of the tub and the door was chipped in one corner.

Once I got over the thrill of not being hurt, we had two problems. (1) The broken shower door and (2) the giant gouge in the tub. Also keep in mind that we aren’t even finished paying for this bathroom yet.

As is well documented here, I’m not good at household things and don’t want to invest any time getting better at it. I wasn’t even sure where to start. The people that remodeled the bathroom retired about 5 minutes after they cashed our final payment so that wasn’t an option. I went through the file and wrote down what I thought were relevant notes and I took a few photos of the shower door and went out for round 1.

First, I went to a local glass shop because they’ve replaced a couple of windshields for us and were always nice and I figured if they couldn’t help us they could at least point us in the right direction. I was wrong. It would be too long and boring to tell you the whole conversation but you can get the idea from this: after I explained what happened the guy said, “What do you want me to do about it?” He also told me that usually if tempered glass gets hit hard enough to chip, it shatters.

Eventually he was able to point to something in my notes that is apparently the manufacturer so I went online and found the local rep for that and phoned and the line was disconnected.

Meanwhile, my husband received my unhappy texts during this adventure. He saw a glass place when he was out and about and ran in there and they were super nice and helpful. They knew the company that did our remodel. They knew the manufacturer. Someone came by to look at the damage. He told us that he’d never seen a door chip like that and not shatter.

Why is this used to make shower doors?

He said he’d put together an estimate for us. I don’t know what this is going to cost us but I am hopeful that I will soon have a brand new, million pound, shatterable shower door.

For the gouge in the bathtub, I spent a goodly amount of time reading disheartening things online about gouged bathtubs.

After what I deemed enough responsible research, I found a do-it-yourself kit that looked promising but asked me 100 questions about my tub. Did you know that some of the color choices are: Artic, Snow, Cloud, Linen and Béchamel? (Barely exaggerating). White, I kept insisting. Then there was something about how to tell what kind of tub you have and you sand the gouge and then smell it. My bathtub smelled like my shampoo which was not one of the choices.

I made my best guesses and went through the order screens. When I got to the end, the shipping and handling charges added another 50% to the cost. So I said, Screw you. I’m not doing that. What the hell are “handling” charges? It’s like when you buy tickets and they charge you a $5 convenience charge to print them yourself. If they were shipping me an alligator I could see charging me a fee. But not for sticking some painty stuff and sandpaper into an envelope.

I did some more research and found the company that made my tub and they had a number to call. I got that lady on the phone and we had to go through the same questions about what color my tub is and what it’s made out of and what product line it is, because that’s something a person should keep track of. And we get to the end of that round and then she said it was out of stock.

She said they buy it from someone else and gave me that number and that’s when I talked to St. Nancy of New Jersey.

St. Nancy was super friendly and helpful and explained to me how she used the product on her sink.

“Are you handy or can anyone do this?” I asked.

“My husband says I have 4 thumbs,” St. Nancy said. “But I think I’m handy.”

My fix-it kit arrived the next day. At first I rigorously followed the directions but the filler stuff just shrunk and brushed out of the dent. So I gave up on the filler and tried to make light coats of the chip filler. That wasn’t looking so hot either. The directions said, “Whatever you do, don’t just glop it on.” But when I glopped it on the gouge was covered.

Not pretty but if it works, good enough for me.

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The Saturdays

This is from the reserves match earlier this week. We sat in the club seats. There was rain, hail, cold feet and a pretty sky. You can kind of see the hail in this next one:

Last week was another busy and tiring one. Apparently at my advanced age I can’t do everything all the time.

Yesterday I had some downtime. Last night I slept like a champion. And today I am trying to do everything again.

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From One Talking Rock to the Other

Check out this giant green rock that looks like the Hulk’s head. I should have put something in there for perspective. I would photoshop something in there now if I had time. It’s about the size you’d expect the Hulk’s head to be.

Today my story The Medicine Woman of Talking Rock is up at Podcastle. Thanks go to guest editor Tina Connolly. It’s originally from Red Tape Stories from Indian Country.

I still haven’t listened to it. Maybe on my lunch hour. Another busy day and I apparently left the phone I don’t know how to use somewhere. I’m hoping the kitchen counter. I have an incredible knack for making my life more difficult right now.

Remind me to tell you about the great shower door disaster of 2013.

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Technology Is My Friend

Guess who turned 50 today? Julian Lennon and Donita Sparks.

Since I’m turning 50 this year I’m paying attention to other people who are turning 50 this year. On several occasions I’ve made half-hearted attempts to collect information on people and things turning 50 thinking I could do something “hey, 50 is happening” with it. (ex: “Hey, The Birds is 50.”) But then it seems overwhelming and kind-of depressing.

We’ll see how I rally when the day comes.

So, that weird noise you heard last week?

That was me getting a smart phone. Now there are only 12 people left in the whole world who don’t have one.

I’ve had good reasons for not wanting on. I don’t need another gadget that I don’t know how to work. I hate having a full time distraction device that I can carry with me. I think it’s a ridiculous amount of money that I could use for something else.

I caved so I can tweet at Timbers games.

That’s not the entire reason. Also, peer pressure.

We were having burgers before the reserves match yesterday and I was catching up on Twitter and I said, “Hey, now we’re those people who look at their phone at the restaurant instead of talking to each other.”

It was a major milestone.

I still barely know how it works. I got up to page 30 in the 338 page super guide I bought before I got tired of looking at a book about a phone. I realized this morning that I still don’t know how to make or receive calls but since then I’ve gotten two robo-calls and turns out I could do it without the superguide.

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