Problem Solving

Downtown, Portland. This photo came out all blurry because I couldn’t be bothered to stop walking while I took it. This is my attempt to salvage with some arty Photoshop dial-twisting.

A couple of weeks ago I had one of those horrible days which, briefly summarized, involved major things being broken and no one showing much interest in helping me fix them.

I held it together for awhile but eventually I had a meltdown and did what anyone in my position would have done, I got a sleeve of Girl Scout Cookies and sat in front of my computer and looked at bathing suits.

I’ve written about trying to find a bathing suit before, (2007, 2004 and 2001), and it’s always an ordeal. Also, I didn’t realize until I looked for that URL that it had been 4 years since I got my last one so I guess it was time. I only wear a bathing suit about 3 times a year so they last forever.

I looked at a bunch and then, for me, impulsively bought one. If only technology disasters really could be cured by buying clothes. The bathing suit arrived and the bottoms were the wrong color.

At first I thought I must have screwed up my order but even the order sheet said “blue” and the bathing suit in the box was nothing resembling blue.

All my time and energy is in use right now. I don’t have the stamina to solve one more problem. I spent about ten minutes trying to decipher their return policy. They have at least 5 brands shipping from the same place and there are different rules and I’d have to call and I’m sure they have a phone tree and some halfwit would take my call and tell me how easy it will be to return if I just do these 10 steps. I haven’t even started and I hate it already. After 48 hours of indecision and me carrying the package back and forth to work (which of course was a box, why cram a bathing suit into an envelope when you can ship it in a box?) two times, I said screw it.

My bathing suit will not match.

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4 Responses to Problem Solving

  1. Marvin says:

    My darling wife would rather have a root canal than shop for a bathing suit. I totally understand.

  2. Kira says:

    Awwwww Pam! How annoying! Even the easiest return policies are a pain in the butt. I had to return shoes to Zappos today because they were for Nikki’s wedding and one of the other bridesmaids couldn’t find them in her size. It ate a good thirty minutes out of my day and they even do free returns where you just print the label. Whenever I order from Overstock, I know I will own that item forever the second I hit “complete order” because I looked at their returns process once and it made my head hurt.

    Anyways, whatever. Mismatched bathing suits are adorable. You’ll look great and who cares as long as you’re at the beach with people you love?

  3. AEJ says:

    Good for you. Start a new fashion trend. I’d help you out and do the same thing, but I don’t wear evil bathing suits.

    I passed a sign on the way home from ECU today that advertised “Cafe Risque”. What a stupid name. The clientele that will go there won’t even understand how to pronounce it anyway.

  4. Keetha says:

    Own it. Walk around like you ordered the bathing suit that exact way.

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