Tag Archives: everyone is stupid

I haven’t been taking photos lately. Bob texted me the other morning to say that the sunrise was amazing so I ran outside with the camera. He was right. (He was on a walk.)

Not too long ago I complained about dog crap in my yard. Yesterday I saw two dogs in my yard. They were kinda cute little mutts running around sniffing all the corners. I went out there and they looked really hurt. I didn’t even yell at them like I do the cats. They ran away, which was what I wanted, but it would have been nice if they ran over to lick my hands and say hello.

I probably should have followed to see where they went. They both had collars. But I didn’t have shoes on and wasn’t in the mood right then.

My husband gave me this for my birthday. Everything should taste like this chocolate bar. They should make cookie butter out of this and cookie butter ice cream out of this. It was so delicious I am tempted to see if I can find a stash somewhere online except my pants are getting mid-winter harder to button so I will not.

In other candy related news, did you hear that Cadbury Eggs are now going to be made with crap Hershey’s “chocolate” – I know. I’m not going to buy them. I just saw the “mocklate” episode of Friends so I keep wanting to call them Mocklate Eggs.

I recently read a tip on a website which was: in addition to keeping a calendar on your phone or computer, also write your appointments on a paper calendar. Then in the comments someone wrote: great tip!

I don’t even know where to start.

Can I just write a list of all the old timey things I do and consider them tips? I keep a written address book. I do menu planning which I write down on a piece of paper and put on the fridge. I also write my grocery list on a piece of paper. Checkbook register – you bet. I also do my taxes by hand. I electronically file the federal taxes but Oregon gets a piece of paper in the mail.

Help yourself to any of these tips. I’ve lasted this long and I’m doing okay.

Every year at this time I am amazed that we’re doing this all again. The world is going to be ruined for the next month.

Have you ever had it happen where you have a quick errand, maybe you need to run to the hardware store or grab something at a big box store? Then you realize it’s 3pm on a Saturday between Thanksgiving and Christmas and the worst thing you could do is try to run a quick errand?

I always plan everything by when the store opens. If it opens at 10am, I will be there at 10:01am and out of there by 10:30am. I expect my intense dislike of anything crowded (except Timbers games) is well known to anyone who has read more than 3 of my posts. Maybe other people don’t think the world is ruined for the month of December.

It’s a cliche about how everything starts earlier and earlier. But it feels like it’s true. Christmas music before Thanksgiving? I had to reprogram my car radio because I don’t want to hear any Christmas music for at least 2 more weeks.

I had to go to the mall to take care of a few things so I went on Friday realizing it was the last weekend before insanity. Santa was there. Everything was in full swing. Before Thanksgiving.

I do not approve.

A few months ago we noticed our mail had stopped coming.

At first we thought maybe we just weren’t getting mail. But Bob keeps track of the Netflix so by Day 4 he knew there was a problem. On Day 5 he went to the post office where the nice clerk said, “Well yes, here’s all your mail. I have no idea why it’s being held and the person you need to ask isn’t here.”

The word “dog” was scrawled on one envelope.

In that packet of mail was one of those “you have a package at the post office” slips so I had to go back to the post office the next day to pick up my package. Again the person we needed to talk to wasn’t there.

That afternoon (day 7 since they suspended our service) we got regular mail delivery and in the mail was a letter from the post office informing us that our dog was out and the post office did not want to deliver our mail until they were reasonably assured that there was no danger from our dog. They don’t want postal carriers getting bitten.

You know what? I don’t want postal carriers getting bitten either. But you know what else? WE DON’T HAVE A DOG.

I wrote back and explained that and pointed out that without timely notice and a description of the dog: there is no way I could do anything about this.

What am I supposed to do? Walk around knocking on doors asking the neighbors if they have a dog that happened to be loose and on our lawn a week earlier?

The past couple weeks have been ground zero for doing it wrong.

I wanted to put a travel alert on my bank account. I went to the branch and was told to wait for a banker. I talked to the banker and he seemed surprised like I was a fussy old lady and he was just indulging me. Then he thought I should open another bank account: just for travel. That way if something happens, I have an alternative.

I’m ahead of you pal, I have another account at a different bank. I also asked the banker specifically what the travel related fees would be and he agreed that there would be fees and that would be something to watch out for. Then he tried to sell me an American Express card to save on fees. I felt it was unlikely that travel related fees would be more than the annual fee for Am Ex.

Then after all that he told me I still had to call customer service.

Remember my rant about Verizon and how all they can do at the store is sell you stuff? Same at the bank. They can give you your very own cash that you earned yourself and they store for you or they can sell you stuff. They can’t do anything else. I called customer service and got into a phone tree where the only choices were to check my bank balance or get transferred to someone who could sell me something. I had to do that thing were you yell at the auto-attendant until she reluctantly transferred me to a person. I finally got that settled.

And speaking of Verizon, I needed to confer with them also about this travel. Phone tree that had no choices that I want. Yelling. Put into waiting queue and told they are experiencing extra long wait times. What does that mean? Unfortunately I didn’t have an extra long time right then. I decided to try the live chat (I know you’re shaking your head right now, desperate times … ). The interface was confusing but once I was connected it was kinda okay. At one point I was totally confused about what was going on and thought: I should call customer service so I can ask questions. Then I remembered that I was talking to customer service. I think this one is settled, too.

Finally, I ordered a specialty item from a store that only sells 2 things. In order to do this I was forced to create a user account, including a separate username other than my email address and it scolded my only moderately secure password. Like I need a really secure password for a place I’m never going to return to. I ordered both things. One magically arrived on my doorstep. Never got a shipping confirmation or anything. I figured the 2 items must have been separated in transit but several days later I still hadn’t received them so I went to the website and logged in. It didn’t need a username, just my email and moderately secure password. And next to my second item it said cancelled-back ordered. So I had to contact customer service which luckily was straight email and I also kindly suggested implementing a system to inform customers what the hell is going on with their order. I guess it’s not cancelled, just back ordered and they appreciated my suggestion. Just kidding! No one ever tells me they appreciate my suggestions.

I’m going to be offline for a couple of weeks. There will be tweets and photos.

These two games wore me out. I am finished.

Argentina v. Iran

I don’t think one single game has gone the way I expected. I thought was going to be an easy rout for Argentina with me turning off the TV after the half so as not to have to watch the horror. I was very wrong. Iran was amazing. I found myself conflicted. Who doesn’t like to see an underdog beat one of the favorites? Argentina found a heartbreaker in stoppage time and I felt bad for Iran. But if you’re going to get your heart broken, at least it was at the feet of Messi.

Germany v. Ghana

What a game. Great playing on both sides. And completely exhausting. I thought it was kind of interesting that the commentators seemed to be writing Germany off when USA and Portugal haven’t even played yet. Let’s not jinx it by assuming the outcome.

So, the good news is that the technical problem I was whining about the other day is actually an update to Photoshop.

Just kidding. That’s not good news at all. It took me what, 18 months to finish a 15 hour class on the last version I had? It asked me if I wanted to import my settings. Yes, I clicked. My settings were not imported. Bob asked if I had a back-up. Of course I have a back-up but I don’t need a half-day project because 1 computer program updated.

I’m going to putter out in the yard for a bit. I need the fresh air and sunshine and the garden needs any attention I am willing to give it. I need to wait until my bread is finished. I haven’t baked in a couple of weeks and have been missing decent bread. EVERYTHING that comes from the grocery store, no matter what it’s called or what shape it is, is soft, squishy crap. I would rather not eat bread than eat soft, squishy bread.

Yesterday when I sat down to post, all my stories vanished from my mind. It wasn’t until I started doing something else that I remembered some of them.

All my winter long underwear is disintegrating, or worse. I have this habit of thinking I will buy new seasonal wear and then putting it off for so long that I decide to get through the season with what I have and buy new the following season. But I don’t get rid of the ratty stuff. I hang onto it in case I need it before I have time to get the new stuff. And then the cycle continues.

I, cleverly I thought, went and found some long underwear on clearance to buy now. Then I could throw away the ratty stuff and be treated with pretty new stuff next winter when my butt gets cold.

I bought it on March 27th and according to my tracking number it arrived in Portland on April 3. Since then it’s been in transit. At the beginning of last week I phoned to find out what was happening and of course the phone system of Giant Global Delivery Service is automated and after making me state my 22 digit tracking number into the phone, it told me my package was in transit. Gee, thanks for the helpful update!

Then I went to email help. After 24 hours I received message, apologizing for any inconvenience I might be suffering while being denied access to my long underwear for next winter, and asking for the delivery address.

Shouldn’t this information be attached to the tracking number?

I complied and 24 hours later I received message, apologizing (… etc) and asking for my phone number and assuring me that they would contact me to let me know what’s going on.

Still haven’t heard. Already this clearance underwear isn’t worth it *plus* they couldn’t ship the order complete so who knows what else I have to look forward to.