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Category Archives: pamily
Dad!

July 4, 1930 – July 16, 2026
96 years old!!
I don’t know if anyone reads this who doesn’t know me in real life. Or even if anyone reads this. 😂
I’ve been thinking about writing something but waiting until I time to write something really good. But what does that even mean? I might post the obit later.
But here we go: what a life this man had.
At our last few healthcare visits I said: If a cat has 9 lives, Dad has 109 lives.
Quick list of things he survived: WWII as a child in Hamburg, Germany; colon cancer; heart attack; all kinds of mobility issues and hip surgery and then falling during the recovery; lost an eye to shingles; lost a leg to a complicated leg circulation thing; 3 bouts of pneumonia in 10 months.
He fought death hard. He wasn’t going out without a fight.
I had envisioned the end as this quiet time with all of us at his bedside. I had worried that the last stage would be drawn out because he was so tough.
But when it finally happened it was chaotic and quick and a surprise. He was surrounded by caregivers and we were trying to make him comfortable. Then he was gone.
And well done, Dad. You’d been through enough.

My dad gave me my love of soccer, particularly the World Cup. I first learned about the WC when West Germany was in the final in 1982. I don’t recall that I watched the entire match but someone had sent Dad a tape (?) of the game and we talked about it.
World Cup has been something we could bond over and enjoyed talking about.
The 2026 tournament was hit or miss for him because he was spending a lot of time in bed the last couple of months.
I went over for a match — I think it was England v Norway. He was in bed and said he didn’t feel well. I said, “I’m going to keep you company. I’m going to turn on the match.”
About 10 minutes later I heard, whump! behind me. He’d transferred to his wheelchair. He said, “Sweetie! Can you get me my hairbrush?”
I helped him get himself together and we watched the match. He wasn’t paying much attention to the teams but he enjoyed watching the play and goals. Too bad he missed that England v France match.
It’s been a long adventure. I would tell people he had a heart attack in 2010 and he’s been diminishing a grain of sand a day since then. He moved to be closer to us in 2019 and we’ve loved having him here.
Hard to believe he’s gone.
There is a Celebration of Life at his retirement home on Saturday. For the family celebration — it will be in California TBD.
But if you want to celebrate my dad — listen to some jazz, whip up cocktails, grill some steaks, and enjoy a laugh with people you love.
Posted in doing it wrong, pamily
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A Little Bit of Chaos

There’s a lot going on in this photos.
From left to right:
The broken off piece of rain cutter — the raccoons did it.
Summer.
Erin’s feet and pajama bottoms.
Bucket with trailcam — easy to move around when you have it set up like this.
Christmas coffee cup on the table.
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Why Is She Doing That?

Covington, GA cutie pie.
One time, a long time ago, when my grandma was at a pretty advanced age, she stayed at our house.
I can’t remember the occasion but I was preparing dessert and trying to serve ice cream with our pie. The ice cream was fresh from the freezer and rock-hard. I was trying scoop it out and lost control and a chunk of vanilla flew across the room.
My grandma looked at my husband and said, “Why is she doing that?”
This memory is never not funny.
We still use this as a tagline anytime we drop something or spill something. We laugh every time.
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The Sad Squash Situation

If you recall, earlier I posted about how squash bugs ruin everything.
This is my entire squash crop.
Impressed?
I don’t even know where those white ones came from. Are they just ornamental? I don’t know. I’m going to try to eat them at some point and I will let you know.
I’m going to try to cook the pumpkin for my Thanksgiving pie. I still have pumpkin in the freezer so all isn’t lost but this is a sad year for squash grown in my own garden.
I can’t believe I am cooking Thanksgiving dinner next week. I used to fret about it and do a planning calendar.
This year is the same as last year. I’m making a super basic dinner and Bob and I will bring plates over and eat with Dad. We just got a turkey breast. I’ll make mashed potatoes, stuffing, rolls, and pumpkin pie. We’ll eat something green on Friday.
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Olympia Washington, Part 1

We went to Olympia, Washington a couple of weeks ago to go to an outdoor music festival and celebrate our anniversary. I used to have family living in Oly and there was a period of a few years in the 90s where I was up there almost every weekend and had so many memorable adventures.
I love Oly and I can’t remember the last time I spent any time there.
I happy to report: it is the land that time forgot. At least superfically, it has changed very little. Lots of cool little shops, tons of fun places to eat, beautiful scenery.

We went to the farmers’ market and I got this amazing panzanella salad with lots of fresh fruit, little bread slices, savory green salad with parmesan curls and a fruit vinaigrette that was not all cloying or overly sweet. It so delicious.

This is a new and smaller location than last time I was there but Orca Books is still a fabulous and well-curated bookstore. I don’t know why I am standing so weird in this photo.
I have more Oly photos and stories for later. As per my entire life, I had a computer problem I had to solve when I sat down and by the time I finished I didn’t have a lot of time and I am rushing to post this.
Sprechen Sie?

My dad gets a small German pension, or I should say he did get a small German pension. Every year they send a proof of life form and last year I did the form and called a mobile notary to come over and give it an official stamp and then I mailed it. Dad got one pension check and then they stopped.
I emailed all the documents again. I wrote a snail mail. I sent all the POA documents in case they needed power of attorney to deal with me. I emailed all the documents again. No response.
I had pretty much given up. What else could I do?
Then, I got a letter at my house addressed to me that said I need to do a proof of life form. While I was navigating this packet, I found a letter at Dad’s apartment from them explaining that they couldn’t mail him his pension checks because they had been returned as undeliverable.
Can we all just pause for a second on this? Let’s send a letter to the address where we’re telling you we can’t send things.

I filled out all the paperwork, got all the signatures, gathered all the things they wanted. I also took a picture of Dad holding their letter: that’s Proof of Life.
According to the instructions you can submit this all online but it’s not in English. FINE. I understand a little plus its 2024. We have Google Translate.
I commence with the website. There are lots of things to translate. It was a long and tedious process but also kind-of funny because it was like all the aggravation of doing a bureaucratic process via a confusing-to-navigate website, but also frantically cutting and pasting back and forth with Google Translate.
Inevitably, I got to the part where I had to “choose one” to tell them what form I was completing and you’ll never guess what happened? Mine wasn’t one of the choices. The form that I was filling was not there. But I had to translate about 16 choices to be sure. If you asked AI to go through every episode of I Love Lucy and then write an episode where Lucy needs to use Google Translate — this is what it would come up with.
I gave up for now. I’m going to try again after I’ve reviewed all the paperwork again and my brain is fresh.
Time and Tilt

A couple of years ago I found these big xmas lights in the xmas box. They were too much for the tree but I draped them over this cabinet. Even then they were a bit much so I unscrewed light bulbs until I had it at the level I wanted.
Turned out, I liked having this source of lighting better than a lamp. In the evenings when I watch TV I like a little bit of light and this is just perfect.

Later I put it on a timer so it comes on for a couple hours in the evening and is timed to go off right at bedtime. And it comes on for an hour or so in the morning.
As the light changes with the time of year, I adjust the timer. As we head into winter I add more and more time and as we move back to summer I change to shorter and shorter. In June we don’t even use it.
If you look in the background of the top photo in the very top left, you can see the little lights I have on in my room. I like little lights.
I am headed down to Orleans to visit Mom and check out the scene down there. Photos when I return.
In Memoriam – Uncle Barry

All of us out on business

Auntie’s 50th Birthday surprise party

Camping in the Olympic rain forest.(We were out there long enough to set up our tents, have a nice hike, eat a campe dinner, get rained on, pick up camp and go home.)

Uncle Barry cracking us up with one of his hilarious stories.
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Bye Uncle Barry

Look at these hot young kids. My mom and auntie! Too bad my dad’s looking a little stoned. I’m sure it was just bad timing.
What a life! Born in Boyd, Texas. Worked for federal highways and lived all over the country: D.C., Boise, Denver, Juneau, Olympia.
Huge family that loved him and that he loved.



He has been such a huge part of my life since I was a little kid. I can’t believe he’s not in the world anymore. 😢
I have a favorite print photo of me standing on Uncle B’s shoulders on a camping trip. If I can find it, I’ll scan and post at some future date.
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Another Poor Trip Log, Different Trip

Just hint of the unfathomable destruction from the Slater Fire (2020) from our view driving over Greyback Road. There are no words. I was stunned and the further we drove, the worse it got. There are spots where as far as you can see, there are just sticks — the remains of the trees are just sticks. You can’t even believe it’s real. There were moments when it looked like bad CGI. So heartbreaking.
The weekend after we went to Chicago we went to Orleans for a family wedding. On this trip I also took few photos and fewer notes.

(photo by Aileen Wilder, amateur Photoshop by me, hehe)
The wedding was beautiful and fun and a wonderful celebration but also very rainy with mud. It was great to be with family and so fun to see all the kids having such a great time together.

(photo by Bob Hughes)
The canopy was rigged at the last minute using a covering for a greenhouse — but it was magnificent.

Back at the house, the dogs in a rare moment, at rest. Photo and amateur Photoshop by me.
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