You're Doing It Wrong

Bob saw some cheapo long handled tongs on the kitchen counter. He picked them up and asked me what they were for.

I told him I bought them at Target because I dropped some stuff behind my desk at work (pack of gum, hair clip — critical items) and I didn’t know how to get them. He thought this was hilarious. (FYI — I haven’t had a chance to try it yet but I’m already concerned my arm isn’t long enough.)

Another time we were out for our morning walk and I carried a new flashlight I bought because I can never find flashlights when I need them. Bob claims we have lots of them but they must be in a secret place that only he knows about. Because you know spouses do that to each other: constantly hide things so no one can find anything.

So we’re on this walk and I see something moving in the park and I figured it was a bunny. I grabbed the flashlight but I couldn’t turn it on. I was twisting the top and twisting the bottom and pushing the bottom and searching for a button. Bob couldn’t stop laughing.

Today rated high to super high on the incredibly miserable scale. I won’t go into all the details.

So after this long miserable day I had to step out into the downpour to get to the train. I apparently mis-timed it because instead of the 5:50pm train that I wanted I had to stand there for about 15 minutes until a train arrived. A good thing: it was the train driver who is my new friend. We chatted on the way home one night when I took a later train after yoga. He always makes little announcments about the weather and tells people to have a good night at the park-n-ride stop.

I generally use one of those big paper carrier bags with handles that you get from the department store when you buy clothes for hauling my crap back and forth: lunch/breakfast stuff, reading materials, yoga clothes. I know what happens when paper gets wet but it wasn’t raining when I left yesterday and I had no idea how much standing around in the rain I would have to do.

So after this long and miserable day I am hurrying to my car in the dark, in steady rain with a modest wind and my bag completely disintigrates. I can’t even hold it together so I can get my stuff back to the car. I have to crouch there in the rain and shove things in pockets and a little plastic bag I had. Everything getting soaked. Not a shred of dignity anywhere to be seen.

It wasn’t even like a funny mishap. It was completely heartbreaking and demoralizing.

Saturday morning we went for a long walk and this is one of the photos I took.

I’ve explained my eMac has had a monitor malfunction but yesterday morning, while I was answering email, it miraculously flickered back into full color. I didn’t know what to think. I was almost afraid to do anything except at that point, why bother having a computer?

The color worked all day. I worked through my Photoshop exercises and applied them to my own projects. The day was fabulously sunny and it seemed a waste to spend the entire day at the computer so I took a break and brought my Photoshop book to the front porch and read about Photoshop in the wonderful sunshine. And I saw a bald eagle.

I also did a bunch of yardwork. Cleaned up dead stuff. Raked compost-y stuff together. Tore out a ton more ivy. Actually, that’s a lie. It wasn’t a ton. It was only a tiny bit but it’s such hard work it might as well have been a ton. At this rate I’ll have it all torn out by my 50th birthday. (Which is many, many years from now.)

This morning the computer was back to its redless-self. We already know what we’re going to buy but would prefer to wait until several months from now. I think I’m going to continue to limp along and hope it flickers back one of these days. The accompanying photo was adjusted without red. How did I do?

It was a nice weekend. This afternoon I tossed almost all the last tomatoes in a pot and made tomato soup. I picked my pumpkin (look for a photo soon!) and composted a few potted plants that have become a pain in the ass. I chucked a bunch of bark dust on a corner of the yard that desperately needed it. I still haven’t pulled the tomato plants. They keep producing a few tomatoes. It would seem just cruel. As I recall, last year I pulled everything in September I was so sick of it.

I’m trying to learn to draw and I bought a book and today’s lesson was to do a self portrait and then draw someone I know from memory. Boy, if you need a good laugh, I suggest this lesson. How the hell do you draw a nose? For my person from memory I drew Bob which basically means a man with glasses holding a flash drive in his clenched fist. The author says I’m going to see a big improvement after I’ve practiced the lessons. I hope so.

I’ve been practicing my Photoshop skills. I did some very light fixing on this photo (left) and then did some fancy border thing which looked juvenile so I’m not posting that version.

This is my Grandfather and I don’t know the story behind the photo or even when it was taken. It’s one of the huge batch I’ve been scanning.

He worked for the forest service in northern California and SE Alaska, so I like the idea of him hanging at Joshua Tree (pure speculation) esp. in a sweater, tie and slacks. As I was working on this, I noticed the tie and decided we needed a close up of that.

Also he’s got his cigar, something I remember about him. If he was still alive he would be 102 next month.

For some reason, on my days off, the first thing I eat in the morning is almost always total garbage. Cookies. Chocolate. Cold leftovers shoveled in while I stand with the refrigerator door open.

On the weekdays my breakfast is pathologically healthy: fruit, plain yogurt, meusli.

I don’t know why I do that on the weekends. Then I’m too full to eat something good and not like my day is off to a good start.

This morning the commute was hideous. It’s bad enough that it was hideous except that it was the second time in 4 days it took me more than 30 minutes: just to get on the freeway. It’s less than 2 miles from my house.

I know I need to learn to be zen and go with the flow but honestly it makes me crazy. I hate commuting. I’ve always hated commuting and there is no easy solution. The only 4 days a week thing helps. If can’t learn to live with it I either have to move or find a different job and I don’t want to do either of those things.

Completely unrelated, but you may have seen ads or read reviews of a movie that just came out called Stay. I read the script several months ago and I’d offer a link but it’s taking too long to find. If you’re determined to read it, I’m sure you can figure out how to track it down.

I intended to write a rant about it then, not understanding that it was actually going to be made into a movie. There is some teeny, tiny spoilage ahead, but trust me, not worth worrying about. If you’ve read even one review you know it’s a twist movie and it’s not a cool twist, it’s a stupid twist. You are taken on a journey into some twisted reality where all kinds of bizarre, unexplained stuff happens, and then you find out why and you want to throw something against the wall.

I’ve seen the trailer and the movie looks like it might be good, definitely well made: Marc Forester directed and Ewan McGregor and Ryan Gosling and bunch of other good actors. Why? Why does more or less the same dopey twist keep getting made into a movie?

I bought this just to show you the amazing power of soy. It’s soy-deliciousl

I had a whole bunch of stuff to update you on but I don’t know where it all went.

I thought about doing a long update on my shows and how they are all connected somehow to Buffy & Angel, but I don’t think you care that much. I will give you a partial report and say: Invasion is excellent. Bones is also excellent but after a couple of episodes they’re on a temporary hiatus while this baseball thing is finishing up. It’s October. It’s cold and windy. Shouldn’t baseball be finished by now? I watched one Desperate Housewives and proclaimed myself finished. There is a fine line between stupid and guilty pleasure and that show has been reclassified as stupid.

Last weekend I watched a movie called Osama which I had heard was very good. I want you to understand that I do not have a problem with “hard” movies and I like movies that make me look at things in a different way or open my eyes to things I don’t know about. I didn’t completely remember what Osama was about, and if it had been a segment on an evening newsshow, yes it was excellent. But in terms of kicking back on a Sunday afternoon to watch a movie that you vaguely remember has something to do about a little girl in Afghanistan, this was an awful movie. I won’t give it all away but it’s about this little girl and her dad and uncle are dead and there is no way for the family to get food or money so they dress her up as a boy so she can get a job. Her situation goes from bad to worse to completely and utterly tragic and then the movie is over. There is not even a droplet of hope when the credits roll. That was probably the filmmakers intention and it worked. It invoked incredible outrage for the situation for women over there. It also bummed out my entire day.

I think I mentioned before that my computer display has pooped out. I finally called a Mac service place yesterday and talked to a very nice Mac-Tech-Service-Geek and he knew what I was talking about before I had the words out of my mouth. The problem is the screen doesn’t display red. I can get by when I’m going email or this, but I’m taking a Photoshop class and practicing color correction is quite interesting under these circumstances. The repair is around $350-400. My digital video board is failing. Or something like that. The computer is barely 2 years old, but for a little more than double that I can get a whole new computer so we’re looking into that at the moment. The Apple G5 is looking pretty good.

Yesterday I did a bit of yardwork. I totally wasn’t in the mood, but the sun was out and it was nice and it seemed foolish to waste the day sitting in the house practicing Photoshop when I could be cleaning up the yard and enjoying the sun in my shirtsleeves. I managed to harvest another basket of tomatoes. I left the plants in but figured they’d be wrecked b/c of the rain, but no. They look good. I don’t know what kind of tomato plant this is but it’s been a champ — produced zillions of pretty, yummy tomatoes, and keeps on going. I also dug around in the front a little bit and pulled out and cut back dead stuff. It didn’t take long for me to grow bored of it.

In the afternoon I made a Buttermilk Pie using a recipe from the NY Times. I’ve never had it before, although I’ve seen the recipe and was always curious to try it. It’s yummy — a light, cheesecake flavored pie. Bob love it.

Today we plan to see Elizabethtown, new Cameron Crowe movie and then this afternoon is my first try at making tamales. Full report tomorrow.

Is it my imagination or is FM radio sucking less lately?

For awhile it seemed like you’d go for days without hearing anything unexpected. It was the same old teeny-bopper hits or smarmy ballads. And the dinosaur rock stations play the same classics AC/DC and Zepplin songs over and over. And the 80’s stations play the same Duran Duran and Thompson Twins hits.

Now there are two stations on my dial that almost always play something interesting. Like a mix of lots of good songs 70’s to present. Station #1 is more alternative — they played The Toy Dolls the other morning. Station #2 plays more of a mix but it’s songs you actually want to hear. I think that’s their motto: “Songs you actually want to hear.”