No Matter What

Bob sent me the URL today for Darth Vader’s Blog. I groaned when I saw it because all these pretend blogs and spoof blogs are old news and usually stupid. Of course I laughed when I finally peeked. An excerpt:

Tonight I have excused myself from the technical debrief of yesterday's assault on Dantooine, opting instead to remain on the bridge meditating on the stars. The force brings to me every whisper of the officers as they wonder at my state. Can any of them know what it is like?

They could never know what it is like to find out you still have a son, a stranger to you, lost amid the squalid systems of the outer rim and counted as a hero by your enemies.

Tomorrow I may strangle General Veers.

Not long ago, when this particular issue was all over the news, I told Bob that under no circumstances was I ever to be kept alive in a vegetative state. If there is anything meaningful in my eyes, it’s because I’m saying: “Teleport me off this rock.” If I can’t eat chocolate chip cookies and guzzle a $10 bottle of Pinot Noir (probably not at the same time), and I can’t handle the remote control or enjoy the sunset, I’m not sure I need to stay in the physical body.

I’m not going to explain my belief system here but I’m certain that what awaits beyond this life is a lot better than a feeding tube and a breathing machine.

That said, I also informed Bob that should anything tragic happen to me before May 19 that he was to keep me alive no matter what, wheel whatever is left of me into the theater, tape my eyes open and once the credits have finished rolling, THEN he may pull the plug.

I went to get a bang trim (this sounds sort of nasty so to clarify: it refers to getting my bangs cut shorter) today and the salon is across the street from the theater where I will be at 9:30am on May 19 to see my movie for the first time and I was so involved thinking about that moment that I almost missed the turn and had to swerve real quick.

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