I thought about making a list of 10 things I would never write about here and then writing about each one. But the only things I could think of I would never write about.
Several decades ago when I was in college I ate buckets and buckets of air popped popcorn on a daily basis. At the time I was a major binge eater and calorie-wise 10 cups of popcorn was a better choice than a loaf of bread with peanut butter. It was also cheap and tasty and had an enjoyable crunch to it. And when I say better choice, I was a poor college student and couldn’t afford a new pair of fat pants every 2 weeks.
My popcorn eating dropped off dramatically after college, but I owned an air popper for a long time and made popcorn now and then.
About 10 years ago I had a popcorn ordeal where shortly after eating popcorn my gum became inflamed. I vigorously brush and flossed and had swelling and terrible pain for my troubles.
I finally did an emergency trip to the best dentist on the planet, Saint Shoneen Sendelback, who moved so I can’t see her any longer. It’s been years and I’m still not over it. Dr. Sendelback with a touch like angel breath, very carefully examined my poor tooth and gum and couldn’t find anything. She decided to give it a good cleaning and give me some rinse and we’d have to wait and see.
During the cleaning she found, deep in my gum, a tiny piece of popcorn kernel the size of a pencil tip. That tiny thing was what was making me so miserable. My mouth was tender but back to normal and I quit eating popcorn.
I will eat kettle corn but I prefer not to have it in the house because it’s one of those foods that I eat 10 pounds of in 5 minutes, shoving it in my mouth faster than I can chew. I’m the black widow of kettle corn.
A couple of years ago my office merged with a larger law firm (start at Feb 23). These people microwave popcorn every single day. What is up with offices and microwave popcorn? I wish I invented it.