Best Day Ever

Yesterday morning I took the bus because I was meeting Bob downtown later and he could take me home.

There was a passenger who broke the all time record for shortest time period before I want to strangle a complete stranger. She could not stop talking to the lady next to her and there was nothing too boring to skip over.

She had a catalog and went through it page by page: “I have a sheets like this. Mine are 400 count and a lighter blue. I paid $89.99 which was a great deal. Usually they’re $109.99 but I had a gift card and a coupon and I used them together. At first they weren’t going to let me but I made a fuss and they did it. The edges are started to wear. And it has a coffee stain. It made me so mad. Gladys and Wilbur Hinkewiggle and their daughter Penelope stayed with me. They didn’t watch for things. They stayed for 10 days. We went to Mt. St. Helens. It was raining. We had pancakes for breakfast. I had blueberry syrup … .”

Are you ready to brain yourself yet?

She didn’t wear a wedding ring and I wondered if she ever stayed up late on a Saturday night talking to her cats and wondering why she was still alone.

I left the office at lunch time and met Bob at South Park for a fantastic fancy lunch. I had the steelhead special which was served with potatoes and these roasted onions that came with long green stems and were delicious but hard to eat. At one point I had a big blob of onion dangling down my throat half gagging me while the rest of was stuck in my mouth and had to resort to drastic measures which were pretty gross to avoid choking or gakking up part of my lunch. If you happened to see that, sorry. I was truly embarrassed.

After lunch we stopped by the museum to see the Elliot Erwitt exhibit which was excellent and then back over the river to El Presidente where Bob had an informal birthday party. A whole bunch of people stopped by to wish him well and eat nachos and drink margaritas. Excellent celebration day.

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