The Comcast Experience
On Friday I went to Comcast to swap out for a new DVR. It actually wasn’t that bad but I’m going to complain about it anyway.
First, the parking lot was obviously the prize winning entry in a challenge to build America’s stupidest parking lot. It didn’t win first prize because that honor went to the Bank of America on Hwy 99 in Hazel Dell across from Fred Meyer which only has 8 spots, all slightly smaller than any normal car and only one entry/exit so that there are 8 cars trying to get out and 8 cars trying to get in at the same time. It’s the Rubik’s Cube of parking lots.
At Comcast I missed the first spot where I was supposed to turn into the customer parking area and the second spot said DO NOT ENTER which meant that I had to drive all the way back around where the vans are and into what must have been the employee parking lot and then make an 150 point turn to get back out because it all dead ends right there.
Once I got myself parked, I went in and it was basically the DMV except smaller and with better technology. Way better technology. They spent big on the electronic signs and digital announcement to let you know it’s your turn and there was nothing left for the waiting area. There’s a gizmo where you get your ticket and you have to pick TV, Internet and I can’t remember what the third thing is, phone service? It prints you out a ticket and you can go sit down on the 4 padded cubes (they couldn’t even pony up for chairs with backs) which were all full so I had to stand there in the middle of the room holding my DVR.
Of course there was a giant flat screen TV cranking out CNN, strategically placed BEHIND the seats so that the only people who could conveniently watch were the joyless clerks who were a tad overqualified for the DMV so they got this job instead, and me standing in the middle of the room and hating all forms of televised news. (Except the Daily Show.)
I didn’t wait long and they got me set up and were polite to all the crazy customers who were demanding extra receipts and asking nutty questions such as holding up their modems and asking if it could be tested for how fast it worked. I guess under these circumstances, I’d be joyless too.
Now I’ve got my TV back.