I finally finished watching the VH1 Top 40 Hairbands of all time. We taped it and I’ve been working my way through it — what was the original show, 4 hours? That’s a lot of hair for one sitting. Plus, you know VH1. It’s like 1 hour = 20 minutes of content, 20 minutes of filler and 20 minutes of commercials.
Okay, so first of all, what were their criteria? I would never dispute Poison at number #1. I will dispute ’til my grave, Twisted Sister at #2. Dee Snider (Fear the Mullet!) made the perfect host for the show, but sorry, no way do they deserve the #2 spot. And if they included bands like Def Lepp, Quiet Riot, Crue and Kiss, why not Guns & Roses? (My theory is Guns & Roses refused to be involved.) And how come Slaughter at #9 beat Ratt (#11) and Dokken (#10)?
I made a chart, giving myself 1 point for every band I’ve owned a record, 1 point for every band I’ve seen live and a point for every band I saw on-set at one of their videos. I gave myself extra credit for bands I have guitar picks for. I thought my stats would be more impressive. I got 50 points out of 120 (160 with extra credit.) I saw 18 bands live, owned 24 bands and worked on 5 videos. I got 3 points for guitar picks and two bands got me 4 points: Great White and Tesla.
I thought it was hilarious that about 90% of the bands had some sort of excuses why they weren’t really “hair” bands. There was one band I never heard of: Steelheart. Must have been an east coast band and must have been really late in the game.